A gist of motherhood
Motherhood is a bliss, or better said a blessing. And you know that blessings require perseverance, patience, hard work and much more.
I would like to share some advice and do’s and don’ts based on my 36 months’ motherhood journey. People do compare mothers to ***. It is rightly said that *** cannot be present everywhere physically and hence sends a mother to take his place. A woman needs to be an embodiment of love and sacrifice for becoming a mother.
For couples thinking of parenthood, I would suggest that the most important factor is the right kind of parenting which starts with choosing the correct time in your life to become a parent. I strongly recommended a gap of at least 1 year after marriage to consider being a mother unless there is a biological or a medical reason creating an urgency or delay in motherhood. A lady needs time to settle emotionally and physically after her marriage which takes at least a year.
Next most important factor is arranging your finances. Though finance is not the only factor, however, it’s one of the most important ones while planning your motherhood. Becoming a mother especially in metros is an extravagance these days if you insist on having good doctors and the best maternal care available around you. A financial shortage may also lead to complications post maternity as expenses increase thereafter and usually do not reduce down once the baby is born.
Once you know you are expecting it’s a time of joy for you and the family. Do take good care of yourself in the first trimester to avoid miscarriages and other unwanted complications. Post that next important thing is to focus on your food, sleep and timely medical aid in the next three trimesters. Always remember your baby is what you eat. Eat the right kind of food and take a lot of fluids. Avoid alcoholic drinks, over exercising and smoking, because you don’t want to harm your baby. Once you know that your health is good and you are all set to be a mother, maintain your calm and avoid getting tensed or worried unnecessarily. Do take your iron and folic acids regularly. Take care of constipation and get rid of it at earliest in pregnancy. You may consider Patanjali ‘Phalgrit’ which I highly recommended for aiding bowel movements in expecting mothers.
Once the baby is born, it is a time to celebrate for the family. I recommend new mothers, especially those who had to undergo a C-section, to avoid many visitors at least for the first two months. This is as a precaution for both mother and baby so as to avoid any infections, disturbance in sleeping and other maternal activities requiring privacy post-delivery. The spouse especially needs to be considerate and be patient as this an utmost tender period, both for the infant and for the mother. While massages are recommended both for mother and child postpartum, mothers who had a C- section need to take their gynaecologist’s permission before starting them. Most important feed for a baby immediately after childbirth is mother’s milk. It’s a myth that this fluid is unhealthy for the baby. Apart from mothers, who had a C- section, others need to start breastfeeding the baby after recovering from childbirth and their doctor’s permission. Make sure you arrange all help and support for yourself right before baby’s arrival, that ideally is your mother, else you may consider professional nannies and other family members. Never try to involve your spouse in these activities as an experienced lady can be the best support for the mother and the child unlike the father, who has to support the family as well. Neither would he have the right knowledge of such support systems. Some mothers may become unhealthy mainly due to lack of support as they are staying in a nuclear family or if the spouse’s family may not at times be supportive, creating a lot of issues including postpartum depressions.
To avoid this, make proper arrangements before a child’s arrival. Mothers diet is also a major factor for a speedy recovery both for the child and the mother. You may consider light and fresh meals initially, then gradually introduce soups with cow ghee. What you need to avoid completely is refrigerated foods and exercises in the first three months after the baby is born.
Giving your baby the right massage is also very important. You may take help of an elderly family member or call an experienced masseur The same person may be hired to massage the mother as well. Getting the adequate amount of sleep is important, but that’s the most challenging aspect as baby may take days or months to come in right sleeping pattern. In such a case it is important that the mother does not compromise her sleep and sleeps in the day or whenever her baby takes a nap. Once the baby starts sleeping in the night, the mother can start doing the daily chores regularly and exercise to become fit.
It’s highly recommended that mother and child stay indoor in first three months to avoid any infections and stress.
These are some basic guidelines for the mothers, but the most important factor is support and assistance from their spouse and family so that they can recover faster and are able to take care of the baby independently. Continue breastfeeding at least for first six months and till a year if the situation permits. Working mothers please leave the child only with a trusted family member, considering modern-day mishaps in daycare.
– Article by Vidya Krishna